thetranquilplace

2006-04-15T23:18:00.000-07:00

Somehow, time outside of camp is always never enuf.. read this in a book, '' time, a strange thing. it weighs most on those who have it least..'' These 3 days of freedom went past like real fast.. and tt 11 days that i had to wait felt like eternity..

Zzz.. going back to camp again..haizz. I have this theory abt life in the army..there are landmines everyday waiting for you to step on.. you can practice caution but you gonna meet one someday, you can never be sure your day will go past safely until you are slping. Last week went past quite normally, but the whole group of us stepped on a few landmines.. Those instructors they are pretty gd at controlling their temper lol, they can keep mum for the whole day den night time den they unleash their fury..Due to tt reason.. i have to go back camp 2 hrs earlier!.. 5pm.. so early.. haizz

Anyway, quite enjoyed this few days out though got times quite frustrating, haha went out to eat marche, played some mahjong, watch lots of tv..haha and one more thing, eat and slept a lot too haha. Shall start planning for wat to do during next long weekend during labour day..haha

Ciao.

2006-04-02T04:45:00.000-07:00

Attempt to change my blogskin, but i am a slow worker, still got lots more stuffs to work on haha.

Leaving in about another hr for 2 weeks haizz..

Anyway shall continue with my 'to be continued..' lol that has been there for quite a time.

On the day of passing out, quite a lot of stuffs happened, firstly we did the final touch up to the place we had lived in for the past 10 weeks. Upon completion, we changed to our smart no.4 (supposedly the uniform in the best condition).. to realise that we are to help carry the refreshments to the parade square, imagine carrying a carton full of stuffs together with 2 bags which containing all our belongings.. by the time we are done, my uniform is soaked and the paper carton actually also got wet and the paper fragments stuck to my uniform.. so goes my 'best' uniform..

When the parade finally begin, we stepped our platform and begin our 'show' with whatever we had..

However.. halfway, the parade commander( the guy giving the commands ) he sort of screwed up and gave the wrong command, luckily no one noticed but i heard he was made to do a week of extra duties. lol. Another thing which happened was that during the portion where we had to stand and keep still for a while, i saw the audience pointing to some of those standing and heard stuffs like ''look, look''. Common sense would says that someone had fainted.. quite a shame realli since nth like this happen the parade on the day b4.

Lastly.. this happened to me.. the part the parents were supposed to put the caps on for their child.. i realise i lost mine..ahhh panic.. luckily i borrowed a cap from those on duties though it was a size too small, but heck better than being the only bald head standing among the sea of green. This can be seen from the photos lol.

Tts all for now, as can be seen the template aint tt complete yet, shall touch up the nxt time..

2006-03-09T00:32:00.000-08:00

Pop yest.. haha gone is rec neiw, to replace him is private neiw..

Shall start with the events on 7 mar..

It was a hot and sunny day..haha lame, anyway tt morn we had basic assault course. Basically, it is the final lesson of our basic close combat training, we were supposed to go outfield and practice our strokes on dummies. Due to the unfortunate or fortunate thing tt our graduation is the day after.. we need not wear our sbo when doing it haha, somehow even the mud bath we were supposed to hv was gone ( other companies supposedly used lots and lots of water to prepare a 'luxurous' mud bath for the recruits crawling through ). So it was pretty easy getting through the course.. but we were still pretty shagged upon its completion.

Almost immediately after bac.. we had BMTC SCH 1 GAMES DAY!!! And yours humbly, was given the chance of participating.. haha long time since i took part in such event, last time was during pri sch, when i joined the prefect race ( now tt i think of it, these 2 events are almost similar, lol). Anyway, the game i joined is the Transformers.. (robots in disguise..haha.. this is wat those who heard it replied, are you?). In it, we were bound in pairs by our legs and had to go and dress up a model from pt kit to army uni with full sbo. After lots of hard work and short cuts here and there, we were pretty confident. ( The joker, a token which a company can used to raise the stakes was placed on us.) For the first 2 pair ( i am the sec, ^-'), we totally owned the race, we were done with our sec pair when others still on their first.. Yet luck was not with us.. the timer was somehow a #$%#^, he had us redo the boots which took away precious time and for the fourth pair, their knot came loose, and they had to retie it.. So in the end, we lost and emerged sec losing, 2 pts for not making it first and 20 for the joker. This 22 pts if not lost, could hv got us a overall sec and not a miserable 4th among all the enhanced batch..

Tt night we had a mini party, after a long time cleaning our bunks, removing all the dust behind the cupboards and stuffs. During the party, we basically eat and eat and drink and drink..haha. Chips, Oreos, crackers, twisties, 7up, pepsi, f&n orange... all of these went down our throat.. It is fortunate tt we din fall ill the nxt day..haha

to be continued...

2006-03-01T03:28:00.000-08:00

Ha, got back results, not bad..din fail my gp.. was so afraid..haha quite satisfied with wat i got..haha
but somehow they say i got glum face.. maybe i am juz a bit greedy, feel quite empty cos i din get wat i want pretty badly ha

Hmm, booking in tml morn..shall enjoy myself tonight drinking and watching tv haha

Nxt week pop, my rec life is coming to an end.. after this i will hv become a chao private haha..

Has my rec days change me? Not sure when this change came abt, but i truly do not wish to ever regret not doing something in my life..i have changed by having more 'shang jin xin'? Since there is only my army career now, i will work hard and go against the stream, i wun wait for chances any more.. Of cos this is wat i feel now..haha

Go play liao..haha

2006-02-18T23:53:00.000-08:00

6 weeks gone.. 3 weeks more to go..

Firstly, a happy v day to all haha..

Hmm, quite a lot of stuffs happened this week.. my first and maybe only grenade throw ( which occured on valentine, 14/2..haha..sianz.. ), den my sitest, a 3 days outfield in which we were divided into groups and given missions for us to do to judge our capabilities..

Grenade throw..haha i was pretty afraid to be frank.. some of the stories i heard was pretty gross, a recruit's grenade slipped out of his hand and he was like freaked out, the commander in charge immediately took action and pushed him out of the bay and sort of shield him.. in the end the recruit was not hurt but the commander got a hole blown in him in the chest area..yeah stuffs like this.. so when i received my grenade and placed it in my 'utility belt', i was pretty afraid it would juz blow up..haha. The explosion was loud, when i first heard it, was pretty shocked. Luckily my throw went pretty well, though my head was quite empty den ( there were some farnie stories though, like some of them threw it so near tt they literally got their ass kicked). Quite glad this episode of my life is over, though it was pretty exciting.

Haizz, guess my dreams of being an officer may be over.. i sorta screwed up my sitest( situation test), the mission i was in charge of din proceed as well as i thot..so sayonara to being called sir..haha

Realised i missed out some details of field camp, cooking haha, we had field cooking which was quite fun. The combat rations( those green packets ) taste much better when cooked over a proper flame than when eating from the packet, there were things like pasta with shredded chicken, dried shrimp glutinous rice. The desserts were better in my point of view, there is a peanut paste dessert which actually tasted like those you can buy cos the main course were sorta minced up. The commanders even showed us how to concoct a s**t mixture, lol, add some water, milo mix and the packets of biscuits (these biscuits absorb water very well, so if tired of them, add some water and tada, you have sponge cake). Anyway, cook the mixture over fire till it is a bit dry and it is ready to be served, though it looks really disgusting.. it taste pretty good.

There is also fireflies in tekong lol, din realised singapore still has them, saw them during the night walk, spectacular, to hv small lights decorating the sides of the roads. One last pt to make, as the former president of the Astronomy Club of Njc.. haha, the night sky in tekong is beautiful, maybe cos of the minimal lights, possible to see stars i din see b4 in singapore, perhaps cos of nth to do at night, so i tend to gaze up more..haha. But the sky is like so wasted there, no one to appreciate it with..haha

Yup, think tt is all, hope a lvl results dun come out so soon..haha i aint prepared yet..cya soon

2006-02-11T22:41:00.000-08:00

came back from field camp..haha 6 1/2 days of ''resort'', quite relaxing haha, other than the part abt always being dirty and the trying to control my 'load'.

started off the first day with the 8 km route march to the rubber plantation den build our basha which wasn't properly aligned, quite slanted but my commanders quite nice..no i rephrase very nice..haha juz told us to sorta take our time to adjust them without giving time limit, cant rmb wat i did tt day, dun think it is anything strenous ( think we learned how to put on camo and camouflage ourselves )( learnt an interesting term for those who din camo their lips properly 'hey i can see your 'cb' lips ) had quite a gd nite slp tt night.. no mosquitoes.. nth except for tt root sticking my my back but still bearable.

the nxt few days were similar.. lessons in the morn and practical at the afternoon. One thing i muz mentioned, whoever invented the prickly heat powder is a genius, somehow you can really go without a shower after using it, the body feels refreshed after it tts how i survived my 7 days..haha ( but hey if you can shower go shower..) field camp really gets you to appreciate stuffs, water, fresh food, having a proper bed.

the technical break was long awaited, haha half day rest and a wipe( i wun say bath with only like 1-2 litres of water). We slept in a sch 40 over ppl in the room, everyone was lying side by side, cosy..lol. the place was also where i released my load ( intended to bear for tt seven days... but realli cannot control... yesh this part is quite disgusting..haha)

the last 2 nights were somehow less fun..the first night i quite feeling stomach upset and i dropped my specs on the way to ans nature's call.. found it only the nxt morn.. due to all these reasons, only slept for abt 4 hrs b4 we had to pack up and leave.

The nxt day was trench digging, had to dig a man-sized hole.. it may not sound difficult, but trust me it aint tt easy, took me 4 hrs cos din noe the right technique( if done properly and by experienced guys, it will take only 45 mins...lol, my timing is so far off) My rifle also kana stolen by my sgr, luckily like i said, they were v nice, only made me do guard duty which was slack haha, was resting half the time and drinking syrup and eating the goodies from the accessory pack( tuna spread, biscuits, fruit bars). Thot could hv at least my 4-5 hrs of slp since we leaving early the nxt day.. but when i lie down in the pit... i could hear a mosquito every 5 mins or so... really can drive a person mad..i doubt i slept more than an hr, somemore i needed to wake at 4 to start filling the pit.. haha but i can assure mine is slack only the last day is complainable. yup tts it.. so at the end, i was left with minutes scars on my hands and elbows from contact with sand and a lot a lot of dirty clothes..haha

2006-01-29T07:30:00.000-08:00

first day of the WOOF yr.. haha..Happy 'wang' yr to whoever reads this..

saw my uncles and cousins during the reunion and heard their army stories.. haha quite fun and interesting to see how diff it was den and now.. so i cant complain abt my life in ns( actually nth much to complain, quite norm, i wun say it is pleasurable.. but endurable.) den also played with my cousins ( those lower pri one ), now i am in army (characterized by botak head..) i supposedly become 'stronger' and immune to pain..lol, had to carry and piggy ride them abt..haha.. quite fun to play with them.

hmm, realized army made me stupid and my mahjong sux haha.. saw and played mahjong with my uncles and aunts on the night b4 12 am to 4 am.. haha, i lost abt 30 dollars in the first few games.. super pressured.. haha so much money lol, would hv lost more if my mum din step in.. haha yet quite fun.. to master the art of playing skillfully, stuffs and techniques i din knew b4.. muahaha shall learn to be pro and tok ppl haha..

happy new yr again..

2006-01-27T18:10:00.000-08:00

Second blog in like 10 mins, haha which i separated since not tt relevant( actually, i juz plain bored.. no one is online... zzz)

hmm, forgot to mention..i got cough haha, they call it the tekong cough.. supposedly most recruits who came to tekong will get it since they not tt hardy yet.. ben lai i dun hv one.. but zzz when slping in the bunk and everyone else likes to cough out loud b4 they slp..i also tio..

enjoy slping on my bed..haha dun hv to tidy in the morn..oops ( shall do in 5 mins time..i not so lazy and untidy..), one more thing, dun hv to slp under tt mosquito net at night and hv it on top of your body and face sometimes..( can be punished if caught not using it)

bought more comics yest.. quite sad actually.. to think i am spending my weekends trying to catch up with the rest of the world who are moving ahead without me..(sob..) Train boy or 电车男 is not bad..haha for those who dunno wat it is abt.. go do some research.. the story quite sweet haha, cant wait to read the nxt bk..

i missed my train.. and i waiting for it to come back..

2006-01-27T16:50:00.000-08:00

Hmm, third time back.. 3 weeks gone..ha time seems to go past in a flash, so fast..

Came back yest noon around 3pm.. saw no one online.. where is everyone?... The ladies shld be working, but the guys? am i the first one out? Lonely..haha

Do some recap on events that occured these few weeks..

Firstly, received my pay.. haha 270 bucks on the 19th.. yeah.. first salary ever.. but so little compared to the blood i shed.. ( keep having nosebleed inside.. 7-8 times in 2 weeks..haha lets hope nth is wrong with me..) sad to say, more than half the money is gone.. zzz lost my specs.. on the first book-in.. somehow it dropped out of the bag.. since not willing to go out in ugly thick plastic specs, hv to get a new one made.. then also ordered newsweek and reader digest.. lol since they got special prices for nsf and being a gd bro( my sis wanted to order this type of mag for gp, but kana rejected cos exp haha ) i ordered and paid for with my own money..haha

Shooting for first time..lol M16 test in on weds and thurs.. i suck..haha we had 8 shots for each type of target, 4 for practice and 4 for test.. somehow for the day shots, i screwed up.. the word 'test' has it effect on me.. somehow it become possible to hit 4 for practice and miss all.. ALL for the test.. zzz luckily my night shots saved me.. since it was nearer.. haha had 14 out of 16.. so in the end i still passed.. but i missed my marksmen..haha which is like so far away.. can only miss 4 out of 32 shots..

The experience of shooting is quite remarkable, seems so arcade and yet it can do devasting effects.. sad to say, this phase is over liao.. haha nxt one is grenade.. something even worse.. Also experienced wat it is like to survive on little slp.. had abt 8 hrs of slp.. over 2 days.. haha cos during the live range shooting, we had to wait for our turns and there were 18x ppl shooting, we took quite a while.. start at 8 in the morning and ended at around 11 at night, by the time we went back and do all the stuffs we need to.. already 1 am.. nxt day had to wake at 4 plus to prepare.. amazingly still can manage sorta haha..

Tio first mass tekan too at the range.. the platoon commander ( a 40 plus 2nd warren officer) punished the whole platoon cos some of us tried to test the system ( the army system ) ( they din surrender their valuables in the morn and tokked on the phone at night and kana caught ), he also mentioned something abt us being selfish lot and not looking out for each other.. so we were made to do pumping ( i am so glad they can only make us do around 20.. cos in olden days. hundreds is the standard..).. we also had to hold in tt position for few mins and trust me.. not easy... i weak.. haha. Basically, a lot of ppl tio confinement either 1 or 3 weeks( hopefully they will reduce it..), the thing is, if one checks the scheldule, we only hv around 4-5 bookouts.. 3 confinement is like the entire month..

hmm, basically these are those which i can rmb now..haha poor memory.. senile..sianz.. the commanders also said after this bookout, when we nxt bookin.. no more warning and 'hell' shld begin unless we start obeying orders and lookout for each other..( actually there are more things which i wanted to say.. but the net is not safe.. later i tio caught and punished..haha, shall say when i meet you guys..)

2006-01-09T20:37:00.000-08:00

home sweet home.. haha abt in abt 7 hrs will be back at tekong and ready to be tekan...haizz haha..

no idea shld thanks the heavens anot, these few days keep raining.. so keep hearing the cat 1 siren( no physical training cos danger of lightning).. but those commanders say if this continues den we most likely hv to stay back during weekends cos we have a tight scheldule to keep...in dilemma haha

sianz, this person in front of the comp here is man shou.. haizz haven got to really noe my bunkmates well... so a bit lonely haha. Even if noe them well, still will want to hear voices from ppl outside of the island haha..

2006-01-06T14:01:00.000-08:00

really last entry b4 entering ns liao, haha 6 in the morn, had abt 4 plus hrs of sleep.. yet still quite refreshed.. muz be the thot of army, haha

hmm, recap on this week, somehow i not sure, maybe it is watever i did on mon, but somehow i feel i changed abit, became more cheerful, laughed more easily... I also became more appreciative of ppl, especially to my relatives, to see what they hv done for this nephew of theirs who is entering ns, quite touched.. still like to express my gratitude here even though they wun be seeing this haha..

received msg from 'hell' from ed this morn haha, 'brother..very impt listen to instructions freaking carefully.. and dun argue..starting quite hectic depending on your platoon later quite slack'. Frankly, this msg aint helping a lot, haha makes me pretty worried..sec thing i worried, they all say tekong is not tt 'clean', pray pray dun let me encounter anything, i aint tt brave...haha

Lastly,@#$@#$ kaozz, no one msg me gdbye or gd luck or anything.... how can... zzz..haha

Yup, tts all. gtg..

2006-01-06T00:12:00.000-08:00

last day!!! hmm 14 more hrs b4 i step out of this house and go to tekong..haha

went on a food craze despite my throat haha, had fried pork rib, fried chicken wing and fried cuttlefish.. hope throat will still recover in time for ns haha. Shun bian bought watever i still lack, alarm clock, handiplasts etc. Also bought a cap for my botak days haha, but frankly cap aint my style, lol da tou dun quite go with cap, not tt nice.

anyway i finally found the song i wanted haha, tears in heaven by eric clapton.. woohoo super nice in my view haha, i am an oldie cum newdies lover

i am the last ns monkey from 04s06 jumping on the bed b4 i fall over....

2006-01-05T08:35:00.000-08:00

die.. throat still sore.. when to see doc after whoa eh 5-6 yrs? the antibiotics like not working, still aches when swallowing, even water... to think i cant hv my treat of gd food during my last days.. sob...( chips, fried chicken...(salivate all over...))

read my last book ( haha i sound as if i seriously am leaving... choi choi choi, touch wood), casino royale by ian fleming... get who is the main character yet? The name is bond.. james bond.. haha. The book character sure is diff in this first ever Bond book when compared to the movie, at least he doesn't appear so eh playboy and slps around haha.. he even almost got married towards the end..( and i finally noe how to play baccarat, haha, they got intro in the bk, quite easy.. )

yup, eh 30 hrs from now and i will be in army.. gd bye.. haha muz miss me...

2006-01-04T08:10:00.000-08:00

2 more days.. (0.11am now), b4 i enter army.. haha though i dun feel tt panicky, but my mum is whoa really nice and considerate haha, packed everything for me. really grateful, though i thot she a bit only a teeny weeny bit over reacting but grateful nvrtheless..

shall survive this and come back a better person..haha

2006-01-01T17:47:00.000-08:00

zzz. i had made the greatest jk.. those who noe keep your mouth shut.. dun tell anyone.. sorrie to anyone who read and thot i got something wrong..haha i had bit v dumb and such...yeah so sorrie again.. sorry for daoing..

and thks to jc haha, watching me *** for nth...

2005-12-30T07:42:00.000-08:00

falling into tt dreaded pit.. seriously why i dun even bother...time and again i let history repeat itself..

2005-12-15T05:12:00.000-08:00

Yeah.. i survived my 3 days 2 nights trip at KL..( applause pls ) Din thot i would come back alive..

Berjaya Time Square, the hotel which sheltered my mum, sis and me for this trip. The quality aint tt gd.. zz.. imagine having the room not cleaned long after check-in time.. i had to call them up personally. When i stepped into the shopping complex, 1st thot-shopping paradise. 13 lvls dedicated for the shops..sha le wo ba..how am i going to survive this, following 2 women around, watching them carrying out their shopping.. 2nd thot- its HOT!!, not oven hot but there could surely get their temperature down 1 or 2 degrees, maybe more. Man, if they are in the service industry, surely getting the customer to be comfortable shld be part of their policy. Forgot wat my 3rd thot is..lol

Spend most of the first day getting over the lack of slp. Ate a lot too... omg 5 meals... ahhh!! To think i thot i was very full after every meal but 2-3 hrs down i am hungry again...but tt was only for the first day luckily..

Well, not bad place to go if you are into shopping, really cheap stuffs, mostly. So tt place is frankly a women paradise, guys is juz go there pei them, bodyguard cum bellboy. But the comics are cheap lol, $2 per bk, the quality aint as gd but the heck with it. Spend over rm 100 on books haha.. tts my kind of shopping. But i missed a lot of tv! 4 days worth, and i dun hv a recorder.. so tts sayonara to all the shows, bai se zu ta( and it is showing the whole week! damn! ), wu chu cai hong, my cartoons ( yeah, i still watch them ), yu le bai fen bai and so many others...

Anyway, gd to be back, miss everything, the air, my room, the ppl..i went i saw i conquered..haha corny...

2005-12-12T13:25:00.000-08:00

Anticipation often lead to disappointment. Quoting a book, never invest yourself into something, if you knew its loss can cause you your happiness..

!@#@%@#%^%#&^$#%^$%@#(well this could go on, but that is not the main pt)

What was supposed to be a pleasurable trip at M'sia din turn out so well. The bus which was supposed to arrive at 8, was late by 1.5 hrs. Fancy spending twice the amount of time to get to a place juz becos the bus driver din noe the way...(actually spend abt an hr juz turning rounds in the same place, and saw the same scenery again and again...). We had to wait till 3 b4 we can have our lunch at some miserable (dirty and smelly) coffeshop.. and the serving was so small that we mostly ate rice to satisfy our hunger. The adults were so pissed that they wanted to leave the tour, and return back to Singapore via boat. Yet, God still played a joke on us, when we reached the jetty at 4 plus, the last boat has already left!.... So we had no choice but to follow the tour, though we had better sense than to expect anything more.

Yet, if anything turn out well, it was the boat trip late in the day, most of us being city dwellers have yet to see fireflies b4. So when the boat took us along the river to see them, we were truly impressed. The view was simply spectacular, it was as if X'mas descended upon us early.. The way the fireflies lie on the trees and blink their lights, it was as if we were facing a sea of tiny X'mas trees.. truly magnificient. Even had the luxury of getting close to catch them lol.

However, it was a long trip and when we reached home, it was already 12.. And so here i am after 5 hrs at about 5 plus in the morn typing this.. cos i will be returning back to m'sia again...haizz wish me gd luck...

2005-12-10T01:14:00.000-08:00

Whoa, shocked and outdid myself today.. i cleaned the living room, at least part of it, the windows and some of the cupboards WITHOUT ANYONE TELLING ME TO (so proud of myself). Amazing how thick the layer of dust on them was, the whole bucket of water turned dark and my fingers are so aching and rough now... Zzzz, life at home is boring.. to think i will do housework.. lol nvr thot i would be stuck with this b4 sch ended...

FANG WO CHU QU.....

Ghey!!!!

2005-12-04T05:43:00.000-08:00

Ghey!!! The fotos at prom were such a mess!!! I need more practice with the mirror, sianz either my head sticking out waiting to be chopped off, or my smile seems to be tt frozen or my teeny weeny eyes turn into slits... Only 3-4 out of maybe 10 plus of the whole lot were satisfactory.. haizz sianz.. ( these are those tt are satisfactory) I feel so guilty to the other ppl who took photo with me, i so ruined them..

2005-12-03T04:28:00.000-08:00

Carried 5 kg on my back and walked around in chinatown for 5 hours or so.. so tiring. My shoulders are aching from tt weight which i chose ( got some comics from yc, haha) ( i deserve it )

Went around with my grandparents and aunt today. The place was pretty crowded as the shops and stalls were all along the street and the walking path was only like 2m wide. It was hot or rather humid. The stuffs were pretty cheap too. Hmm, have to start my christmas shopping soon, maybe i will start there...

Hmm, i miss you ppl. Even though there aint any tears, the desire to want to continue spending time together is v strong, even though we may meet again. Yet i fear things maybe diff, i want more memories. Already i am forgetting things that happen last yr except for some which i hold dear. And these i fear to lose them too like all the others. Ahhh how come like tt??? The brain is such a weird thing...

Prom

2005-12-01T22:07:00.000-08:00

Whoa, 15 hours since prom ended. Interesting experience, it being the first prom night i ever been to. A dazzling display of costumes that everyone wore, to see everyone at their best, something which wun happen for quite a long time. The items were quite gd, and the prom king and queen are ....Thomas Wong and 'Hui min'!( no idea how to spell). Took photos with most of those i noe when the end drew near( i forgot my camera..grrrr), photos and memories are all that i will hv of this grand event. One of the last times i will spend time with this whole bunch.

First and last time going to a club i think, damned place, no idea what fun ppl see in those places, so noisy, so smoky den the ppl are so shady... and they dun watch their cups!!! Haha, yet tried my first drop of alcohol there. But ours was diluted, vodka with 7up. Shhh... dun tell my mum, or i am so screwed. It wasn't tt bad but what we bought from 7-11 was much better, the lime thingie, forgot what type it was. But so exp.. $6 per bottle. No idea what is so fascinating about alcohol, dun see the pt to be obsessed with it. Juz need to noe how to drink can liao, but seriously i am nvr stepping into a club again, at least i will get one with better environment, one which has more class, even if i pay more.. $20 for a lesson well learned.

2005-11-27T00:13:00.000-08:00

Seeing how weird the last few posts are, shall remove them..

4 more days to prom...

Harry Potter..

2005-11-23T09:57:00.000-08:00

Hmm. watched Harry Potter with the Goblet of Fire yest, one of the very last time that i can hang out with this class..

Frankly, the movie was okay. Perhaps becos i read the book, the story was already etched into my brain, so there was not really anything that i expected from the film. It was interesting though to see other's images of the characters in the book. Din expect Victor Krum to be such a dork. Expected a dark, skinny fellow who had at least some brain. Think the greatest change was The actor who was Neville, din expect him to grow so tall and lean( compared to when he was in Chambers of secrets ). The effects of the movie were good, the scenes were relatively true to the story.

I hv walked thus far alone, i not sure whether the decisions made months ago were correct, there were times i wish to turn back, as the allure of it was so great and yet when i turn around i discover i hv bricked up the way back... I can only continue and hope for the best..

Dailies..

2005-11-07T17:00:00.000-08:00

Grr.. my eyes got astimagtism.. so cannot get dailies contact lenses, so cannot wear for leisure, wear only when i want.. So now the decision is whether to get monthly so can be on my vain quest ( muahaha... ) or continue with specs. Am i willing to pay more to juz try out? we shall see...

Death..

2005-10-29T14:41:00.000-07:00

Hmm, had a close encounter with death, now i noe wat those drowning ppl felt like..

Haha went 'swimming' today after wat 2-3 years maybe more? But guess really haven swim for too long a time liao, less than 25 metres and i am tired. Then i start panicking, haha cos both side too far ( i forgot it was only 1.8m, somehow thot it was much deeper). So i stopped and tried treading on water to breath and calm down.. but haha no help, luckily Jc came and 'saved' me, and reminded me of the depth. Worse still, realised i injured my pelvis ( no idea wat you called it), so cannot continue with the breast stroke, den i cant do free.. so juz stayed in the pool and tried tanning.. but still white... juz that my back hurts a lot like got burns?

Shall go there again when i feel not pain anymore, wahaha, at least swim to the other side.. den tan to be blacker haha

2005-10-28T08:11:00.000-07:00

Why am i escaping? Why has things turn out this way? I never want it to be like this, is there no way back?

Blog

2005-10-26T10:31:00.000-07:00

Weblog, or rather blog, a platform intended for one to leave his thoughts comment for others to view, yet wat is appropriate? Who is the intended audience? We tend to be so ironic, on one hand, we want to say things out to ppl, yet we have to be caution of wat we say in case we offend ppl. So what can we include? Emotions, are they appropiate? For me, i aint gd at opening up, wun help in my probs..By revealing my thots, feelings, it would be admitting i am weak..

I cant really say how much it hurts to think the end is approaching, that the truth of my dream never coming through is becoming clearer.. I cant say how much it breaks my heart whenever ppl mention a reality that was never to be, that it was like rubbing salt into a wound.. I cant say how i dun wish to wake up everynight, cos it is the only way i can see ppl i want to see, even if it is from afar.. I cant say that i felt tears swell in my eyes while writing this..

So wat is appropriate?..

haha..

2005-10-22T10:36:00.000-07:00

Lol, the last post was juz senseless rantings, not sure myself what i toking about..

Hmm, been playing a game called Sudoku these few days, amazing how one can be preoccupied with 81 squares and numbers. Actually i din see them recently, saw them quite a while ago online. My thought den was, what an idiotic game, who would waste time on this? Haha, what irony.. to think i am quite obsessed, actually looking forward to 'Today' so can get a try on them..

But aint having much progress with my revision ( omg .. dieee), only managing 2-3 hours of study per day, at least i got my stats okay i think, going to try out pj paper 2 later to see how skill i am.. haha. 2 more weeks b4 a lvls, after which i guess i wun be seeing you guys for a long time... why muz there be 'you shan zhi yan xi', why muz we face separations?

Anyway, is it a gd idea that we cant read each others thots? If we were psychic, wun life be easier? Words that one wishes to say can be 'heard', how a person actually feel can be known and things would be better i think at least for me. But, with ppl badmouthing each other, i guess it aint tt gd an idea...

One last crappy point, is the world ending? Seems to me tt there are a lot of disasters popping out all over the world, earthquakes, tsunamis, hurricane, bird flu, terrorists attack ( not disaster but heck lah). Are we facing retribution for all that we have done?..

...

2005-10-20T02:11:00.000-07:00

Updated this blog after like 2.5 months, had stopped cos too bz with all the exams tt came or perhaps i was tired and lost my aim..

Hmm, 3 days after school officially ended, and it felt like eternity.

Suddenly realised that i am very scared of being alone, that i hate the feeling of being by myself, hate the feeling of having nothing to my name, hate the sound of my breathing that accompanys the silence. I have never been able to forge strong relationships i think, primary, secondary friends all left or rather i left them, i have no idea. As such i would try almost anything to keep people by my side now for as long as possible. This feeling of emptyiness grows within me, feeding on all my thoughts. Things i do, reading, playing all serve to drive this loneliness away but they fail. So i hope that whatever relationships i have with other people, they will continue with me in the present and to the future and not remain in the past.

I too came to see that i am selfish, i wun deny that fact. I cant help having negative thoughts, when it is me that resulted in the failure, i start blaming people i noe i will never want to blame. I hate myself for being too obsessed and not being able to see beyond things, if this continues, i will never be myself again.

2005-07-24T11:30:00.000-07:00

"....你说要我死了这颗心，最好永远存放在埃及...", a long awaited moment.. Jj came onto the stage singing this song..

Hmm, went to z pop concert yest, was quite reluctant to go since the weather was bad.. but wat the heck, had nothing else to do either, both my mom and sis not at home, so if din go, i will be alone at home.. sianz.

Yup, so went with juncheng and eunice to the z pop concert, arrived at about 4 plus. First few hours were really eh boring lol, cos they keep sending out those who were not tt popular?. Finalists from Superstar, 臭皮匠,... i v superficial one, yah so was actually sitting down and watching the screen.

Then came on ppl like 施文宾，范玮琦，石康军 and the mood became higher.. But audience were actually sort of waiting for the big stars? Cos only when JJ came on everybody started standing up to see him (v superficial.. yeah). He din disappoint, delivering 5 songs, including a duet with 金砂. Yup so pretty satisfied by then, so left since not really interested in the rest and was getting pretty late..

Finally..

2005-07-23T11:34:00.000-07:00

Hmm.. deadbeat, finally handed over Astro yest, the last official session in my life was eh painful, lol injured my toe during the games, now it is bruised..other than tt yeah, really tiring.. captain's ball, soccer, treasure hunt ( had to run to and fro in the school ). The new exco were really thoughtful, bought me a comic figurine for farewell gift, even though i only sort of read the comic once in front of them. Yup tt will mark the end of my astro career in Jc life.. i hope..

Read part of 'Tuesday with Morrie' yesterday, nice book. Even though the language is simple to apprehend, the book had a lot to teach. Through meetings with Morrie, Mitch( his student) learnt valuable lessons of life. Many a times, we do stuffs, thinking we have a sense of achievement, importance in doing so, but these stuffs do nothing to improve ourselves, so are they really worth it in the end? And when faced with obstacles, no point wallowing in self-pity, they do nothing to pull us away, what we can do is to pick ourselves up.. Words can speak a thousand thoughts, so would recommend it if you are free, or lack stuffs to do..

Cranky...

2005-07-10T14:27:00.000-07:00

Hmm, did i really act cranky last week?? I knew i acted weird, but i dun noe why i did watever i did, juz felt low for no reason.. maybe cos of lack of slp, late nite tvs ain't working out for me, have to stop...or cos of the results, though i did average, felt i could hv done better, if i had concentrated more during the revision and not slacked so much..or maybe cos of all the pressure that is mounting..i really dun noe, felt as if i am escaping from watever i am feeling..

Watever happened to life, why is it as we grow older, life throws more at us? Why can't we live without stress, pressure? Is childhood a scam to bring us to earth? No idea who i can share this with.. juz ain't good at opening up..

Human nature is weird, even though we noe we are in the wrong, we still tend to get agitated when the mistakes we make are thrown back at us. I really get fed up on fri, the teacher had to ruin any gd feelings i had, why muz everything be done his way?

Anyhow had another weird dream, was in Japan, lol, was having lunch and i volunteered to buy dessert, can only rmb one person who was there, anyway, saw ppl i nvr saw b4 again, lol had a 11 yr old boy to be my guide and translator...could not get the cakes i wanted and the person gave me some weird looking pastries but somehow, i din went back..and i woke.. lol so weird...

Sianz...

2005-06-13T17:53:00.000-07:00

Hmm, been mugging these few days.. so sianz, guess this shall be how i spent my hols.. preparing for the tons of tests tt are coming my ways..

Juz realised tt sugar rolls are nice.. haha sponge rolls coated with sugar, perfect for tea break. The new fillet burger by KFC also taste quite good, the meat is succulent and juicy unlike mcchicken which is a bit dry.. but the serving is also smaller.. Omg.. i am bored until i am toking abt food..

2 weeks have passed and 2 more to come..

Whee..

2005-06-10T17:30:00.000-07:00

Hmm, this post quite late, cos i been v lazy these few days, dun feel like typing.. Anyway my competition is finally over.. did unexpectedly well, my team got first den the other team we sent in got fourth ( actually they shld hv got better results, but the organisers hv poor mathematics... : p ) den the top individual also from our school, so can say we did ourselves proud, doubt they will perform as well when i am gone.. haha...( so zhuai.. )

Yup, think tts all i want to say, haha thanks to all the ppl who gave me support..
One more thing, someone organise outing leh, holiday stay at home v sianz.. haha

New skin!!

2005-06-03T21:35:00.000-07:00

Hmm, to all those out there.. construction has been stopped, for now.. cos i cannot find the skin to solve my problems.. Saw this tidus skin, thot not bad, so poof...

Haizz, comp nxt week... really doubt will win, haha somehow dun think we put in enuf efforts.. really a bit throw face.. to see this is wat i hv to show to the rest of the sch.. nth... Hmm, nvm shall work hard.. i try.. haha, 5 more days and it will be all over... for now cos still got girl guides and ip enrichments and cca best practice!!

Cts will be at the start of Jul, to all those out there who think i am clever.. i will prove you wrong.. haha, jk... but will be hectic cos got too much stuffs to cramp into this holiday mood brain..

Hmm. gtg back to Astro liao, adieu, post your comments of this skin on board!!

A beautiful mind...

2005-05-23T11:14:00.000-07:00

Hmm, watched a beautiful mind last nite, the show v interesting, at least that is wat i thot. To be able to see numbers in everything...if i do tt, most prob i will go mad as well. But wat a twist the movie has, to think that even the roommate and the inspector were fragments of his imagination.. i thot he juz became paranoid due to the 'work' he was doing. To think tt there is always 'ppl' following you... quite scary, did i imagine anyone of you guys?... BUT, the gd thing is he had support, somehow his wife got attracted to a maths geek and stood by him even when he was mad.. hmm yah.. haha
To end it all, ''only in the mysterious equations of love, can logic be found''..

Holiday mood..

2005-05-22T17:30:00.000-07:00

Lol.. hmm these few days very slack, cos of too much tv liao haizz. den scv still got preview.. haha die... Anyway got a beautiful mind later, shall rmb to watch it.. haha looks nice to me.. touching.. how a man overcame all odds to ehm... recover from madness? and how his wife stood by him all these years?.. haha more tv..

Hmm. had some dreams regarding a same topic these few days.. to think they all seemed so real.. tt they actually affected my mood for the day.. haha. one of them ( fri ) was so disturbing tt i din dare to take naps cos scared it would repeat.. haha. but the other dreams were opposite.. too gd tt i scared i dun wanna wake up..haha crapping cos dun think anyone noes wats the topic abt but me..

Yah, so tts all i guess. shall go eat something now.. den run later.. haha..ciao..

High...

2005-05-02T20:22:00.000-07:00

Whee!.. had an interesting weekend... experienced quite a lot of diff type of illness, Sat giddy den no appetite and vomitted, Sun diarrhoea, today combo of headache and diarrhoea, haha go toilet till my behind hurts till cannot sit properly haha... sianz ah!!

Hmm, to all those who cared, thanks! Haha dunno whether shld hope to be able to go sch tml anot...

...

2005-04-17T18:14:00.000-07:00

Hmm, seems like my blog has become a once per week thing.. lol try to update whenever i can cos dun want another 'shaowei' incident to happen..

Came back from 5 km run juz now.. took quite a long time but at least din walk cos i promised myself tt i can slow down in my quest but i will nvr give up!... Sianz haha maybe cos body still haven recover from yest's 'illness', got woke up by sis early in the morning, not enuf slp, yet go play com for 4 hrs.. without breakfast, so in the end felt dizzy whole day. Another thing, haven got my phone changed cos think my sis pissed my mum yest, den i accidentally pissed her off so she bu shuang me whole day.... but today better liao but have to wait till nxt week...

One more thing.. want to thank cheryl and huiheng for accompanying me on fri night.. suddenly mood swing, den nag a lot to them... felt very low, depressed and tired. But thankfully i recovered, haha cos i dun wanna be like tt for the rest of the week...

Going to watch LOTR ( missed the screening on ch5 during ct period) on the com cos vcd player spoil.. haha sorrie Gui for holding on to it for so long, try to finish as soon as poss

Traps...

2005-04-09T10:38:00.000-07:00

Ahhh, this is the second copy of wat i intended to write, accidentally cleared the cache juz now so had to relog in so everything became lost.... and i wasted my time typing the last post..

Anyway like i was saying... I was watching Tv juz now when i realised that the lights in the living room attracted a lot, a lot, a lot of flying insects ( they look like ants with wings). Initially wanted to whack them with newspaper but they too agile for me liao, din see much results. Den my mum told me to get a basin and fill it with water and hold in under the lights... like tt will work .. lol. But it DID! Lol, for some stupid reason they keep flying into the water and drown themselves.. Din really count, but i think at least 50 of them died in the waters... ( dun come and haunt me lol, but v irritating cos when holding the basin, the flies keep going onto your hands and neck.. yucks! )

This teaches us 2 things, sometimes simple solutions may work wonderously and more importantly not to head to your own death.. Think the flies flew into the water becos of the reflection of the lights, so the lights drew them to their deaths.... Sometimes, tempations or illusions may lead us away from the path and ruin us, however the important thing is to stick to your beliefs and your dreams.. adieu

Tv.....

2005-04-03T14:42:00.000-07:00

This week and nxt got quite a lot of nice shows... Was watching '' interview with the vampire '' last night.. quite crappy but the vampiric makeup on the actors look gd or juz the actors themselves look gd.. lol ( Brad pitt, Tom Cruise ..) dun be mistaken, i not gay... am i? Lol... den tonite got miss congenality and turn left turn right. The latter conflict with Ru Hua so dunno who to sacrifice...

Hmm, still got tons of hw, going to finish all of bio by today.. lol try den gp den lastly if poss do some astro stuffs...Yah, tml no pub stunt liao haha cannot get slots so maybe postpone to thurs ( note to self.. get someone else to play patrick )

I am going to miss the new season of Smallville nxt week.. haizz sianz. It is on at Fri lor, 830 pm... i still hv astro... den every fri somemore.. no hope of watching since my video recorder spoil... This season seems to be v interesting ( Clark can fly den Lois Lane is out though i think Lana looks better... ) But i am going to miss all the actions!!!

Finally....

2005-04-02T01:15:00.000-08:00

A very long week... been rushing each day to finish the astro exhibition, though i muz admit, my workload is much lighter compared to the others.. ( if you ppl can see this, thanks for the effort). However, everything is not really over, cos we still have a public lecture and observation, ( according to one of my exco, Greenlink ppl are coming... 30 over ppl lol, die..... ). Nevertheless, shall try and make this a success, since i gave my first time to this... hehe. But after this will hv to start preparing for astro com in jun, lost narrowly to Pj last year, since according to frenz there, they not participating this yr, muz work harder to reclaim the champion trophy ( actually no trophy, the nus ntu ppl very giam, juz individual awards.. which are also quite cheap ones.. )

Anyone, ppl rmb to go support my club... haha juz recall abt our pub stunt that may be up on Mon, some cartoon characters from a recent movie ( yellow and pink, guess?) den they want me to be the pink one lol, cos they say i am abit on the heavy scale, i juz hv heavy bones! Haha, hmm thinking of getting some yrs 1 to sabo if not v throw face..

Sleepless night...

2005-03-30T00:42:00.000-08:00

Haizz, 12 plus now.. still doing astro stuffs, supposed to send them to print tml.. Cannot install photoshop, den demo version think cannot save, lol bobian den in the end resort to Mr handsome cum Tiancai ( Siew Hui Heng, applause! ). Hmm yah, would like to thank him for staying up till so late with me.. not gay or anything.

Sianz den pack out and stuffs will be till 1 plus, hmm win liao luckily tml not a lot of lessons... Got to go back to Astro liao... Nitez lol

Battle?....

2005-03-28T11:26:00.000-08:00

Previous few blog v philosphical ah? So i shall tok my crap now....Hmm, few more hrs to go before last, really last paper..... of this ct haizz, sianz lor, other ppl slacking den i here.... also slacking. Cant realli rmb all those things tt i need to noe.. maximum output theorem, c=ea/d, q=Q(1-e^-(t/CR))... Haizz, think i gonna flunk this... These few days realli holi mood lol, den really late nights ( slept at 4 on fri? was playing 7 Hand poker.. very nice game lol, shall spread to the class haha ). But sleep is important lol, think the lack of slp is causing me to go sick ( watery eyes and blocked nose now.. die later lol, hall with aircon... going to need lotsa tissue.

Battle.. life is full of it? Studies, Sickness... all considered battles of life? But the important thing is to trust yourself.. haha i trust myself too much? Cos your worse enemy is yourself ( yeah i noe but... so really going to rely on my smartness liao.. lol) Sianz.. going to do astro stuffs after this blog, no idea will do until wat time. Den still hv to prepare for comp and exhibition after this cts.. haizz life is bz ( need moral support from ppl.. lol )

Juz realised gui got new vcd ( son of mask, be cool, series of unfortunate events, house of fury..... ) whee, lets hv movie marathons in class... think the flu is getting to my head.. wish me luck, i need lots of it ( miracles would do better, lol)

Truth...

2005-03-27T15:24:00.000-08:00

Hmm, after several days of using, i confirmed tt blog is a great place for you to tok kok, and for people to bond together? ( Cos they sort of get to know you better? ). But fact is, there are stuffs which are still out of bounds, which are unlikely to be posted on blogs?

According to Cheryl, my blog a bit superficial, cos abit tok kok as in no feelings inside, but the thing is, i feel lah, tt blog is like a face which one portray to others? It is impossible for one to express how her or she exactly feels? Cos not only that there are something that words cannot express, fear that after writing things which are personal on the blog, it may cause embarrassment? For eg, a particular incident makes me very happy, but it is personal? As in i may be the only person who feels tt way? Hmm, yeah, so feelings of affection, hatred etc will be hard to find in my blog? So, dun expect anything much from my blog cos it will be superficial...

Anyway, this post is actually supposed to be up yest night, but somehow a certain annoying person in the house demands the com, i bobian den sick of her pestering so tts why postpone it till now.

Tears....

2005-03-26T01:15:00.000-08:00

Not tt i cried or anything... but come to think of it, it has been a long time since i hv cried, but i recall got one time in pri sch which i cried, ( come to think of it, a bit childish lol ). Basically, to cut short the long story, some of my class ppl were decorating the class, but somehow i was denied entry... den somehow i cried lol... very stupid i noe haha..

The other stupid time... 7 or 8 yrs old, cant remember, my mum was taking the lift den the lift got stuck btw 2 storeys so like can see her legs on floor, her body on the other. Initially nth happened, juz waited for her, den think my sis cried. When my mum ' reached safety' abt 15 mins later, think i cried too.. haha no laughing. ( heart warming? )

Hmm, how come suddenly tok abt such a topic? Actually dun hv much idea as why, juz wonder why is it harder for guys to cry aloud or even softly? There is nth to be ashamed since it is built into us, a source for us to show our emotions... sounds chim. Besides, no idea of wat to add here, since i noob but want to make this look like this has been here a long time liao, so muz flood this place....

Haizz, now v sianz, doing astro stuffs for the exhibitions, suddenly realised got a lot of loose ends to settle, jia lat, dying lol, perhaps this will be the last thing ever done by astro club lol cos of me....( written at one am... )

Anyway, haizz realised i want a laptop with separate internet access, cos i keep missing out on important people to me cos they log in juz after i do ( realised my sis bked at peak hrs, and being the gd boy i am, i passed the com to her... how dumb...). Anyone noes of any com offers now, eh for laptop since my room a bit packed.... tell me

Honor....

2005-03-25T09:55:00.000-08:00

Last night, ch 5 screened men of honor, quite nice, showed how a african-american is not afraid of going against the system in order to realise his dream of being a master diver ( cos of racism, the whites hate blacks, remember? ) He had to went thorough a lot of stuffs juz to enter the sch and to pass his exams. Imagine amputating your leg so you can continue to pursue your dreams....hmm honor. Din realise the show was abt a real guy until the end where got words ( wat all those things that appear on the screen, epilogue? ) den say he succeeded as the first negro with a fake leg to become a master diver at the age of > 40.

Hmm, today going to pay respects to my grandma, think shld be going off soon later, ciao

First one...

2005-03-24T20:57:00.000-08:00

Hmm, hey this my blog..lol. Initially a bit resent the idea but since some smart guy say like that will have more life actually it is becos i abit bored after cts so here it is...

Went to watch Miss Congenality 2 today with gui, su and serene today, quite farnie..hahaha ( snorts ). Sandra Bullock is pretty farnie especially the saggy boobs part, but the plot is v typical. i give it 3 stars?

Hmm, actually supposed to hv more ppl going but they all either dun want to or cannot. Den Koon and Shan pang seh halfway lol, sing kbox den dun want to go out... tt nice meh singing for hrs..remind me of choir haha, resent the thoughts of it ( bpghs doesn't hv a gd choir or is it becos of me? lol )

Haizz, ppl exam finish but i still got phy s.... shld i study? lol or rely on my smartness ( no egg throwing! ) Den dunno whether shld ask my mum to let me go play mahjong on Sat, itchy hands haha

Well, tts all for now, but dun expect regular updates cos i v bz or juz plain lazy (",)